The quest for stability in life is not a rare or unusual thing. I don't think that I'm better or different than anyone else because I can't seem to find it. I feel like I'm stuck in a corn maze; search and search as I might, there's no end in sight!
I try really hard to focus on what matters; doing "right" and working hard. Unfortunately, I have managed to lose myself within this struggle to be great. It's not necessarily what I want to do, it's what I've been conditioned to do. When my father disowned me (this lasted for only a year, then I was re-owned....) I was forced to re-invent myself. I had to scurry and find a place to live, enroll in a school and find a job. I lost a lot of myself in this process. I was so busy hurrying to do what I had to do to survive, I never stopped to breathe.
I am now at a point in my life where I have time to breathe and I don't know what to do with it. Everything is just "ok". Nothing is awesome and there's very little to look forward to. I'm stuck in a rut and need to get out.
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